“How do I choose a counselor?” 

First of all, find someone who loves what they do.  It’s a good sign if they have therapy books on their bed tables.  Look for someone who fits the therapy to you, and be wary of someone who uses the same tools with everyone.  What works fine for one person may fail for the next, so look for a counselor who is flexible.  Very flexible.   Also, a sense of humor really helps.

Look for someone who is non-judgmental.   You want to be able to tell your counselor anything, even the dark, painful, or embarrassing stuff, and be sure that they will still be there for you and with you.  Look for someone who can deal with the complications when you throw spouses or families into the mix.  Finally, make sure that they believe that people can change, even if change has failed in the past, and that there is always hope.